?HOLA LOVERS.?
?I am trying today, mis preciosos. I need to be positive. I need to get my thigh out and hitchhike to LOVE. Because look. Spermfleck and his gardner are having another thingamy. And ahora, everybody is saying that Skeletor is having an affair with that short lady who is married to Will Smith because they work on a show together! It?s entirely possible, lovers, that they have true love because?HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH, lo siento, I could not say that with a straight face! They have nothing in common except being tiny! But she is alive and he is not! Lovers, if they were having the sex HAHAHAHAHAHAHA then I would need to go slap her because DID I DRAIN MY VEINS FOR NOTHING? Did nobody learn that you do not tango with a glorified flesh hanger who wants you as an after-dinner drink? WAS SHE NOT PAYING ATTENTION. I think it is ILLEGAL in this country for la gente not to pay attention to glorious yo!�AY. Lovers. It is too silly. But I am worried, amigos. I wrinkle with the sad. Because he is supposed to be all broken and I am supposed to be the one not caring and licking dessert off of the stomach of some famous hot person! He is not allowed to do this! Por favor, somebody call my lawyer. I want it written in the divorce that I get to win at everything. DO IT NOW.
?In the meantime, lovers, I will be brave, and I will wear beautiful colored dresses and not care that it looks like my leg is bursting out of some spandex cocoon! Because, maybe I am bursting out of a spandex cocoon! The spandex cocoon called MARC IS MEAN AND DUMB.
?Okay, adios! Pray for me! And buy whatever car this is I?m selling in this commercial! I?m sure it is good! It has a wheel and brakes and things! And no vampires! Besos, J.?
[Photo: Flynet]
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/celebuzz/Kggb/~3/_54Q0IH1XQs/part-fug-part-fab-jennifer-lopez-08-2011
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