gmbcorp today: Hot Guy Friday: Lars and the Real Dong

Ryan Gosling. Ryan Gosling has odd taste in ladies. I know some (many) of you would be equally happy if Ryan Gosling either went back to Rachel McAdams OR if he came to your house to give you ?the Gosdong special.? I?m not one of those ladies. I don?t want him to go back to Rachel - and I think they?ve both moved on anyway. But the fact of the matter is that Gosling is single and ready to mingle, despite some brief Olivia Wilde and Blake Lively action. Who will be the one to get Gosling to settle down? Who will he sing to in bed? Is it you?

Jude Law. I just figured, why not? There are about a million new photos of him at Cannes (he?s on the jury), and he?s looking great. ?Great? meaning ?his hairline is kind of wonky but he?s still up for getting you pregnant.? And why not? Jude babies for everybody! (PS? I wrote that before I discovered how many ?pouty? photos there are of Jude in Cannes - seriously, if you want a pouty baby, you should go for Jude).

Seth Meyers. Many of us have been fans of Seth for years. Personally, I?ve always liked him and found him funny to hilarious, but I?ve never really gotten all hot for him. Seth?s hotness is the kind that sneaks up me. He?s the dude that I would have been friends with years and then suddenly, in a vodka haze, I would be all ?I?m gonna hook up with Seth tonight, he?s HOT.? And of course he wouldn?t hook up with me. Because he just thinks of me as a ?friend? too. BOO. By the way, this will turn (most of) you on? Seth?s White House Press Correspondents? speech/roast:

Peter Dinklage. Dinklage came in as a request last week, and at first I was all ?Yeah, I like him, but is he HGF-worthy?? A few days later, CB was all ?Peter Dinklage is HOT!? And I really started thinking about it - some women have no problems dating men who are shorter. Why not go for the gold with Dinklage? He?s handsome, he?s a really talented actor, and he?s got mad steeze.

Paul Bettany. Oh, Paul. I lack the proper words to describe how I worship thee. When looking at your lovely face, I feel like writing poetry. A haiku about my love:

Cute blonde or ginger
No matter, humor and dong
Really turn me on.

I wrote that about my Bettany love. Do you think he?ll like it?

Johnny Depp (By CB) We just did Johnny as the dessert about two months ago, but he just got the hotness back and definitely deserves a repeat. Back then I couldn?t find any flattering recent photos of Johnny and had to run older ones, but he now looks like he?s erased about ten years. However he did it, it?s a welcome change. Not that I wouldn?t have clung for dear life onto the Johnny of several months ago. Some weight and scraggly hair cannot disguise this man?s sex appeal.

Michael Ealy (By CB) Ealy is 37 and most recently starred on The Good Wife and Californication. He was also in Seven Pounds. I just love his piercing eyes. He?s one of those rare guys who looks great no matter what kind of facial hair he?s working.

Mark Wahlberg (By CB) We?ve only featured Marky Mark once on HGF, and that?s surprises me. Maybe it?s the fact that he?s so surly, or that he?s moved so far from his sexy image. I remember watching Planet of The Apes just waiting to see him take off his shirt, (I don?t think he ever did, but there?s plenty of his hot chest in Date Night) and who can forget Boogie Nights and that prosthetic package he should have been born with? He?s the sex. Somehow the grumpy dad routine just makes him hotter to me.

Christoph Waltz (Bedhead) We?ve had several requests for this hot guy, and it?s no wonder why that is the case. He might be relatively new to American audiences, but Christoph thanklessly toiled away for decades on various European television programs before getting his really big break from Quentin Tarantino just a few years ago. When he appears onscreen, Christoph completely owns his characters with an intensity that few have ever matched. And when we see him offscreen, he appears completely gracious and adorably thankful for his success. Forgive me for saying the obvious here, but ?That?s a bingo!?

Cillian Murphy (Bedhead) Talk about jawbones that could cut glass, right? Cillian is so pretty that it almost hurts to look at him, and he?s not so bad at the acting thing either. Beyond blockbusters like last year?s Inception, he gives pretty unforgettable performances in indie films such as the haunted soldier in The Edge of Love, which is well worth checking out if you haven?t yet had the pleasure.

Joaquin Phoenix (Bedhead) This guy is an actor through and through, and I think there was a collective sigh of relief (after the obligatory ?I knew it, that little f*er!?) when we finally received confirmation that his recent Unibomber shtick was all just a ruse. In fact, we at Celebitchy recently celebrated his much anticipated and (now) confirmed return to the big screen in the upcoming Paul Thomas Anderson-directed CO$ film. That movie can?t arrive soon enough!

Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Bedhead) Finally, a former child star who didn?t royally screw up his life and has nicely made the transition to bona fide grown-up actor. From television shows (?Third Rock from the Sun?) to indie romantic comedies [(500) Days of Summer] to summer blockbusters (G.I. Joe and Inception), this actor can do it all. Also, he attended and graduated from an Ivy League college without getting all snotty about it. Suck it, James Franco.

RZA (Bedhead) Now, here?s a true renaissance man. RZA is not only a very prolific and accomplished rapper, instrumentalist, and music producer, but he has now moved onto conquering cinema as well. In fact, he?s currently working through the post-production phase of directing his very first feature film, The Man with the Iron Fist, which is due out later this year. In addition, you might have already spotted him in various movies, including in Coffee and Cigarettes alongside the irresistable Bill Murray.

Paul Walker (By CB) Kaiser told me that Paul is a frequent request, and it reminded me that I saw him walking down the street once in NY City in 2002. My friend was all ?don?t look now, but that?s the guy from Fast and Furious.? He was very pretty in person, but didn?t stand out much in New York. He?s still so lovely, and The Fast and The Furious is still what he?s known for. I doubt that he takes a bad picture. Walker is our dessert today and he?s Key Lime Pie. Refreshing and sweet with that delicious crumbled cookie crust.